Remember how you felt after breaking up with your high school boyfriend? It took you awhile to recover? You cried yourself to sleep for two weeks and lost a ton of weight. Fast forward 20 years—you’ve got the job of your dreams, and life is going pretty well, until you break up with your long-time partner. You haven’t been getting along for a couple of years, and you and your partner have come to the realization that you are both going in different directions. In spite of coming to this conclusion, you still can’t believe how emotionally distraught you are. You wish you could stay in bed for a week, and tell everyone you had the flu, but you can’t take that much time off from work.
As a woman climbing the corporate ladder, showing emotions—like crying or fear—could be perceived as weak and ineffectual by your male peers. Even though being emotional is no longer has the stigma that it once had, riding an emotional roller coaster through a breakup or divorce is pretty challenging. A divorce or breakup is painful, because it represents the loss, not just of the relationship, but also of shared dreams and commitments.
Here are four tips to help you manage your emotions through a breakup or divorce:
1. Realize it’s Okay to Have Different Feelings
You may experience pretty intense feelings like confusion, fear, frustration, anger, and anxiety. These feelings will lessen over time. Until then, you may feel a sense of uncertainty, and this is to be expected.
2. Take Time to Grieve
Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship. There are multiple losses taking place with a breakup—the loss of income, support, love, dreams—and each takes time to process and heal.
3. Keep a Journal of Your Thoughts
Journaling is a great outlet for processing emotions and increasing self-awareness. It will help you clarify your thoughts and feelings.
4. Don’t Go Through This Alone
Share your feelings with your family and friends, to help move through this process more easily, and don’t be afraid to get outside help if you need it.
Managing the chaos of a failed relationship is just one of many balls that working mothers end up juggling. If you are dropping more balls than those you’re able to keep in the air, let’s have a conversation. Text CONSULT to (708) 501-7060 for a complimentary discovery session.
This article was written by The BOSS Network Influencer, C. Lynn Williams
Lynn Williams is an MBA graduate, author, speaker and educator. Her passion is helping parents seeking better relationships with each other, as well as their tweens, teens and adult children. To help working moms have better work-life balance, she created Finding Superwoman™. Her motto: Providing parenting solutions. Building solid foundations. Securing promising futures.
Learn more about C. Lynn Williams by visiting her website at www.clynnwilliams.com
Follow C. Lynn on Twitter @msparentguru