There is a growing trend of men who are now interested in having the woman chip in on the first date. Approximately 51%, according to the website FridayFriday.com that conducted a survey of its visitors.
This is in alignment with some of the conversations taking place between some of my friends and professional associates. It’s interesting to hear how some men are adamantly against entertaining the idea of having a woman contribute anything during the first date; whereas others, are open to the idea due to the cost of dating in today’s economic environment.
Those in support of going dutch cite the shift in financial empowerment as support for their views.
“Historically, men used to pickup the cost of the date because he was the superior wage earner and it made sense at that time. Today, women are making more than men are and the cost to date is higher than it was 10-15 years ago,” says Rick (35 year old teacher).
“It’s no fun to keep spending money on first dates with women who may not be a match for subsequent dates. Going dutch takes the pressure off of men financially and allows the experience to be more worthwhile,” says Thomas (38 year old consultant).
Although I don’t agree with the rationale of the aforementioned gentlemen, it does prompt a discussion about the shift in economics in areas other than dating. If Rick meets a woman who makes more than he does, which is highly likely, what are his dating options? Especially when an average meal may cost $30/person after you include drinks and dessert. A woman making $80K wouldn’t blink an eye at spending $30 on her own meal. However, a man making $40K may have an issue with covering $60 for two people on a date. What should Rick do? Get a second job for spending money?
My recommendation to Rick is to date creatively and economically. There are ways to have an enjoyable outing without breaking the bank. Leverage meal deals options where possible and this can even be accomplished without your date knowing. This will relieve the financial pressure of dating and keep you off of the national women’s DO NOT DATE LIST.
Men, just because you may not make as much as your date does, do not relinquish the power and sexy associated with chivalry. Chivalry has the ability to level the playing field that economics have tried to disrupt in recent years. In my opinion, going dutch shouldn’t be an option even if she insists. You don’t have to spend a lot of money…just be willing to invest in making her feel like a woman.
Kenny Pugh is a Life & Relationship Strategist, Author of ‘Can You Do It Standing Up?’, Speaker, HLN Contributor, singles leader and sought-after speaker on singleness, relationships, finances and life. He is also the visionary behind KTP Financial, LLC. You can find more information about Kenny at http://www.kennypugh.com. You can follow him on Facebook at Kenny Pugh or on Twitter @mrkennypugh.