White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner

All this change hasn’t been easy. Change never is. So I’ve cut the tension by bringing a new friend to the White House. He’s warm, he’s cuddly, loyal, enthusiastic. You just have to keep him on a tight leash. Every once in a while he goes charging off in the wrong direction and gets himself into trouble. But enough about Joe Biden. (Laughter.)

All in all, we’re proud of the change we’ve brought to Washington in these first hundred days but we’ve got a lot of work left to do, as all of you know. So I’d like to talk a little bit about what my administration plans to achieve in the next hundred days.

During the second hundred days, we will design, build and open a library dedicated to my first hundred days. (Laughter.) It’s going to be big, folks. (Laughter.) In the next hundred days, I will learn to go off the prompter and Joe Biden will learn to stay on the prompter. (Laughter.)

In the next hundred days, our bipartisan outreach will be so successful that even John Boehner will consider becoming a Democrat. After all, we have a lot in common. He is a person of color. (Laughter.) Although not a color that appears in the natural world. (Laughter.) What’s up, John? (Laughter.)

In the next hundred days, I will meet with a leader who rules over millions with an iron fist, who owns the airwaves and uses his power to crush all who would challenge his authority at the ballot box. It’s good to see you, Mayor Bloomberg. (Laughter.)

In the next hundred days, we will housetrain our dog, Bo, because the last thing Tim Geithner needs is someone else treating him like a fire hydrant. (Laughter.) In the next hundred days, I will strongly consider losing my cool. (Laughter.)

Finally, I believe that my next hundred days will be so successful I will be able to complete them in 72 days. (Laughter.) And on the 73rd day, I will rest. (Laughter.)

I just — I want to end by saying a few words about the men and women in this room whose job it is to inform the public and pursue the truth. You know, we meet tonight at a moment of extraordinary challenge for this nation and for the world, but it’s also a time of real hardship for the field of journalism. And like so many other businesses in this global age, you’ve seen sweeping changes and technology and communications that lead to a sense of uncertainty and anxiety about what the future will hold.

Across the country, there are extraordinary, hardworking journalists who have lost their jobs in recent days, recent weeks, recent months. And I know that each newspaper and media outlet is wrestling with how to respond to these changes, and some are struggling simply to stay open. And it won’t be easy. Not every ending will be a happy one.

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