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The 3 Lies We ALL Tell Ourselves About Money

Wednesday night, more than 60,000 people around the world listened in on a live teleseminar conducted by Soul of Money Institute founder and author of the award-winning book, The Soul of Money, Lynne Twist; joined by renowned wealth coach Tammy White.

I became familiar with Twist’s work as I was doing research for my own book, The True Cost of Happiness: The Real Story Behind Managing Your Money, which looks at the real and often non-financial causes of our behaviors around money. To this day, I can honestly say that Twist offers the most transformative insights and solutions I have seen when it comes to aligning our financial choices with our authentic goals and values.

Through her many years as an activist, in everything from fighting poverty and hunger around the world to social justice, environmental sustainability, and financial wellness; Twist has observed and shared what she calls the 3 great money myths we all carry about money. Myths that are debilitating, at best, and make us feel like we never have enough and are never doing the right things.

“This is not your fault,” says Twist.  “Yes, you’ve got responsibility, but you’ve also got to realize that we are laying in a tsunami of messaging that tells us we have to have more. They make you think that you’re not good enough until you acquire and become something that you’re not.” “This results in an unhealthy relationship with money that has us behaving inconsistent with our humanity,” she adds.

As for the ‘3 myths’ Twist has identified, they are as follows:

1. There’s not enough to go around. We believe and behave as if there’s not enough. There’s not enough time, there’s not enough love, there’s not enough money; we aren’t enough, etc. Twist points out how for many of us, our first thought in the morning is, ‘I didn’t get enough sleep,’ and our last thought is, ‘I didn’t get enough done.’ This myth of  ‘not enough’ not only subconsciously legitimizes the never-ending pursuit of accumulating more than you need for you and ‘yours,’ it also means someone, somewhere is going to be

left out — we need at the expense of others. This mindset, and the never-ending treadmill it puts us on with regard to acquiring money, not only undermines any sense of financial well-being, but it’s hell on relationships and kills our natural humanity towards others.

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Pushing back against Myth#1:  Begin with a reality check. Myth #1 is simply not true. There’s more than enough of everything to go around. Be honest with yourself with regard to how this is playing out in your own life. Twist says the cultural mindset around ‘not being enough’ is so loud that we have no idea how difficult it is to disengage from it. Once you step into the truth that you are enough, and that each one of us has a deep well of power and uniqueness, you’ll hear a different voice.  You’ll naturally discover more powerful ways of dealing with money.

2. More is better. If someone told you ‘they’ll have enough when they get more,’ what would you think of their chances of finding genuine

contentment and joy?  Ask yourself if an ‘outsider’ could see this pattern in your life, and acknowledge what it’s doing to your chances for happiness; particularly around your finances. Don’t feel bad or guilty. This ‘lie of scarcity’ is simply the result of conditioning. Twist mentioned the size of the storage industry as a great example of this in the teleseminar. It’s a huge and growing industry based on us building ‘houses’ for things we don’t use. Meanwhile, there are millions of us who are homeless. ‘More is better’ is simply a symptom of a society that’s lost its way.

Pushing back against Myth #2:  Do you feel like you need more of everything all the time?  More money, more ‘stuff,’ etc? That’s not surprising given that the messaging to have ‘more’ is everywhere all the time. There is nothing wrong with having more, but the mindset of this myth never gives us the satisfaction of looking forward.  “No matter where we go, there’s a leakage that doesn’t allow us to experience the power of prosperity,” says

Twist. When we develop an appreciation of what’s there, and step away from ‘moreness,’ what we have can expand, nourish us, and nourish the world. When we let go, beautiful things are waiting for us.

3. That’s just the way it is. Twist calls this the myth that holds the others in place, and allows us to not question them. My #3 comes with a sense of resignation, there is ‘buy in,’ and we literally give up on pushing back against the real causes of our troubles — unrealistic fears of lack and scarcity.  Perhaps one of the reasons resignation feels so bad is because it drives behavior that is completely out of alignment with who we are as human beings — creatures who are meant to evolve and help others evolve.

Pushing back against Myth #3: Engage in practices that change our way of being. You can try new practices for saving, budgeting, and investing. Make your spending intentional and deliberate. Most importantly, design a vision for your life that reflects your own definition of prosperity.

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