Wanted: A Hand to Guide Me

I believe in mentorship, and study after study shows that it can be the critical difference in who moves forward at a company, in an industry or profession, in society and in life in general, and who gets left behind. Mentors are desperately needed in the black community, in particular, in the ‘hood, in college, in corporate America, in business, in church–everywhere. However, too often we only think of mentorship in terms of getting others to mentor us, not in terms of actively looking for opportunities to mentor others. Until this changes, there will always be a shortage of mentors.

Actor Denzel Washington also emphasizes the importance of mentors in his book, A Hand to Guide Me: Legends and Leaders Celebrate the People Who Shaped Their Lives

(2006, Meredith Books). Like Washington and others in his book, I’ve been blessed by great mentors, including my third grade teacher Donna Ware (an adored friend to this day), Time Magazine Group Executive Editor Sheryl Hilliard Tucker, and others who mentor me in areas ranging from leadership and parenting, to bodybuilding and spirituality.

The people who honor me as their mentor range from my children to current and former interns and employees of Black Enterprise to professionals and entrepreneurs who are accomplished in their own right. I’ve enjoyed extended relationships with some of these friends and have been only an occasional source of support and advice for others. In a few richly rewarding cases, the mentorship relationship is a mutual one, with each person pouring into the other. My two-decade-plus relationship with Black Enterprise Editor-in-Chief Derek T. Dingle is a perfect example of such a relationship in my life.

However, in every case, I gain far more than I give to these relationships–not

the least of which is the great pride I take in seeing them grow into the greatness and purpose that God intends for their lives. I am especially thrilled to see how enthusiastically most of the people I’ve mentored go on to pursue the mentorship of others. They understand that the true measure of a successful person is his or her willingness to replicate the probability of success for others, to help create other successful people. It’s not just about how high you climb, and who can pull you up; it is also about who you pull up, and maybe even push higher above or ahead of you.

Anyone can be a mentor–especially you. If you are a recent college graduate, you can help encourage someone still in college or high school. If you are in high school, you can encourage the dreams of someone in elementary or middle school. If you have a criminal past and are now a law-abiding citizen, you can help other young people to avoid your mistakes, or show other offenders how to make it while staying on the right side of the law. Any one of us can mentor one of our brothers or sisters still trying to see possibilities beyond the ‘hood. It doesn’t have to take a lot of your time either. Mentorship can be about:

– Offering to be a source of honest, nonjudgmental, no-strings-attached advice
– Helping someone to find a summer job or internship–or better, hiring that person yourself
– Writing a letter of reference for a job, college, or graduate school application
– Helping others to avoid the mistakes you made or take advantage of the opportunities you missed in the past
– Showing them around your place of work
– Agreeing to speak to their class or on their campus
– Taking them to lunch for good (and ideally for them, free) food and conversation
– Connecting them to someone who knows what you don’t know or who has what you can’t give them
– Simply treating someone with the importance they deserve, even if they don’t know how important they are yet

I have done all of these things at one time or another for people, just as there are so many people who have done and continue to do the same for me. I encourage, urge and implore you to do the same. If we all make the commitment to be mentors to others, we’ll all be more likely to find mentors for ourselves when we need them.

Alfred A. Edmond Jr. is the editor-in-chief at BlackEnterprise.com.