actions that don’t move your plan forward, then consider retooling your plan. Signs that things are not working might include missed opportunities, the inability to find support, disorganization, or lack of enthusiasm on your part. That’s why it’s important to remain flexible throughout the process. What you read in a textbook or discuss in class will not always manifest in real life. Therefore, take your time, enjoy the victories, and move beyond the difficulties. Continue to develop your plans in preparation for the coming of greater change.
A should’ve, could’ve, would’ve: are you a sayer or a doer?
As we all know, it’s easy to come up with plans but it’s the follow-through that matters most. “Sayers talk about what they don’t have, why life is unfair, and what they wish they could do; doers are often people who are afraid, but who are willing to feel the fear and do something anyway,” says Francine Ward, who coaches in California.
Many would-be reinventors get bogged down just thinking about the tools and resources they’ll need. Allowing your mind to wander with reasons why you can’t start leads to immobilization, failure, and disappointment. “People have to be willing to be uncomfortable and to move from the familiar,” notes spiritual coach La Tonia Taylor.
Pamela Mitchell, of The Reinvention Institute, believes that even in difficult, unpleasant times, you can still make an effort. “You start to carve out, even if it’s just a moment, things that fill that passion,” she says. And understand that while you’re working this job to take care of your kids, your kids won’t be kids forever. So it’s really a moment in time. You need to make plans along the way, to lay some groundwork.” It’s important to realize that the rest of your life won’t involve your current situation, no matter how extreme.
Be considerate and understanding with your current situation, but let it drive rather than limit you. Do not get discouraged because doing so will slow or halt your progress. Charlotte Scott-Day, a licensed marriage and family therapist, advises changing your mind-set by refusing to think of yourself in terms of labels, for example, as a mother or a wife. Instead, think of yourself as an individual with the potential and desire to accomplish your goals. Working to achieve a long-term goal means working in incremental stages. Execute tasks using a timeline sensitive to your present situation, and seek to learn as much as you can about your intended future. Mitchell says a shift of attitudes will help you see your current situation not as a block, but as the launching pad to your future.
“Right now you may have to spend most of your time on the other stuff and just a little bit of time on your passion, but eventually that mix will shift,” she says. “When it [does] you will have a base from which to start making that change.”