Here’s How To Protect Your Peace And Your Paycheck

Code-switching, emotional labor, and daily resistance is real

Hi Fairygodmentor,

As a Black professional in a predominantly white workplace, I often face microaggressions that leave me drained. How do you protect your peace and address this without jeopardizing your career?

Yours truly,

Exhausted but Hopeful

Dear Exhausted but Hopeful,

First, let me pause for the cause and let you know that I see and hear you. What you’re experiencing is real—and it’s not all in your head, you’re not overreacting, or being “too sensitive.” Microaggressions may be called micro, but their impact on your peace, confidence, and mental health is anything but small. And yet here you are: still showing up, still hoping. That’s powerful.

Navigating these experiences while trying to protect your peace and career can feel like walking a tightrope in stormy weather with a blindfold on. That’s why I created the RISE©Methodology—to give professionals like you a framework to ground yourself in your power and respond with intention, not just reaction.

Let’s walk through it together:

R – Reflect:  Before reacting, pause. Ask yourself: What exactly was said or done? How did it make me feel? Were there any witnesses? Document these specific moments—dates, times, people involved. Keeping receipts isn’t petty; it’s powerful. This gives you a record, especially if a pattern emerges.

I – Identify Your Intention: Do you want to address the person directly, raise it with leadership, or protect your energy and disengage for now? All actions are valid. You get to choose how and when to engage. Your intention guides your strategy. I would highly suggest that you act sooner rather than later. Timing is everything if you’d like these behaviors to end.

S – Set Boundaries & Speak Up (If Safe): In my book on self-advocacy (Show Your Ask), I mention that when you “raise your voice, you raise your value.” You might say: “When that comment was made (be specific on what was said and when it was said), it made me feel uncomfortable. I’d appreciate it if we could be more mindful moving forward.” Short. Direct. Professional. You’re not explaining your humanity—you’re asserting your dignity.

E – Elevate the Conversation (or Escalate if Needed): If the microaggressions continue, consider involving HR or a trusted mentor or sponsor in leadership. Use your documentation. You deserve to work in an environment that respects you. And if your workplace isn’t there yet? Elevate yourself. Don’t be afraid to explore places that will value you fully.

Please don’t forget to rest and recharge. The toll of code-switching, emotional labor, and daily resistance is real. Protect your peace. Lean into community—trusted friends, mentors, and yes, your Fairygodmentor®—who can refill your cup when it runs dry.

I want you to post this message everywhere you can see it! You are not the problem. Your presence in these rooms is not a threat—it’s a gift. And your boundaries? Those are a blessing that command dignity and respect. You have value!

You got this!

Yours truly,

Your Fairygodmentor®

Joyel Crawford, fairygodmentor, contributor — (Photo: Kirten White Photography/BE)

About Joyel Crawford:

Joyel Crawford is an award-winning career and leadership development professional and founder of Crawford Leadership Strategies, a consultancy that empowers results-driven leaders through coaching, training, and facilitation. She’s the best-selling author of Show Your Ask: Using Your Voice to Advocate for Yourself and Your Career.

Have a question for Your Fairygodmentor®?

Submit your career and leadership questions, whether it’s about navigating a micromanager, setting boundaries, negotiating for a raise, or handling burnout. Ask Your Fairygodmentor® today!