Q: I am a 36-year-old divorced mother of two. I work full time and attend school part time. I really don’t know what my calling is. I am [pursuing] a degree in business administration, but I don’t know where I am going with it. Right now, I am a conference planner. I’ve got debt issues, procrastination [issues], and I’m trying to pull it all together — sometimes the road gets hard. I have so much to do, and I am so unorganized. Can you help a sista out? Please!
–S. Malloy, Beltsville, Maryland
A: Take some time for yourself — a couple of hours each week away from work, school, and kids — to figure out what you want out of life and what makes you happy. If you are going to be happy as a working, single parent and part-time student, you must be clear about why you’re taking all of this on.
Write down your five most important priorities. Resist the urge to consider your family and friends’ needs; this is about what you really want. At the end of each week, ask yourself: How much time and energy did I devote to addressing these priorities? If your priorities and activities aren’t in alignment, make some changes in either the former or the latter, until they match up.
I recommend two books: I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was: How to Discover What You Really Want and How to Get It by Barbara Sher (DTP; $14.95) and Choosing Truth: Living an Authentic Life by Harriette Cole (Simon & Schuster; $22).
Mail your motivational questions to: Help Yourself, BLACK ENTERPRISE 130 Fifth Ave., New York, NY 10011 or send an e-mail to:firstname.lastname@example.org.